Im not a happy girl!!

I wonder shouldn't the preparation of wedding be fun & enjoyable & exciting? How come I don't have any of the feeling? I feel very sien.. Dun feel like preparing anymore. Can I back out now? How come I drag preparing now wherelse I always look forward to it last time.. My $700 is gone. Wat should I do? Can god give me some direction? Sigh .. I just wana hide under my bed forever ... Life is boring